Wednesday, July 12, 2006

THE WORLD STANDS ASIDE AND MAKES ROOM FOR THE PERSON WHO KNOWS WHERE HE IS GOING AND IS ON HIS WAY

When you have a vision for what you wish to achieve in your life, not only will others stand aside and let you pass, but they will join you in your quest as well.They will instinctively recognize your enthusiasm and zest for living. When you speak of your passion in life, your definite major goal, they will see the intensity of your desire, and they will respond with encouragement and assistance or they will stand aside. It will be apparent to all who know you that you WILL succeed.

By Napoleon Hill


Blogged on 9:51 PM by Upay

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TRY TELLING YOUR BOSS ABOUT THE THINGS YOU LIKE, AND SEE HOW WILLINGLY HE OR SHE WILL HELP YOU GET RID OF THE THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE

In recent years, great strides have been made in overcoming the traditional adversarial relationship between workers and bosses. At last we are learning that when we focus on better serving our clients and customers, everybody wins. When you begin to focus on what's good in your company instead of what you don't like, you will be amazed how quickly you will have more responsibility, and soon you will be teaching your employees how to do your old job.

By Napoleon Hill


Blogged on 9:45 PM by Upay

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COOPERATION MUST START AT THE HEAD OF A DEPARTMENT IF IT IS EXPECTED AT THE OTHER END. THE SAME IS TRUE FOR EFFICIENCY


In most large organizations, the amount of time and energy that is squandered in interdepartmental rivalry is enormous. Managers who compete with others inside the company waste valuable resources that should be directed at fulfilling the company's mission to serve its customers better. Worse, a negative, internal focus can cause the company to miss opportunities, the full effect of which may not be realized for months or even years whether you are the head of the department or the newest worker on the staff, you can help your company immeasurably by refusing to become embroiled in internal strife. Compete with yourself to do the best job you can do instead of competing with others.

By Napoleon Hill


Blogged on 9:41 PM by Upay

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THOSE WHO CAN'T TAKE DIRECTIONS GRACIOUSLY HAVE NO BUSINESS GIVING THEM

If you are an irresponsible or argumentative worker who cannot accept instructions from others, you are destined to remain at the bottom of the workforce. Before you can ever hope to manage other people, you must learn to manage yourself and your relationships with others effectively, particularly with those in higher positions in the organization. Unless you can learn how to manage your relationship with your own boss or bosses, you will never be able to manage a relationship with your subordinates.By Napoleon Hill


Blogged on 8:50 PM by Upay

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Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Ambil Tindakan Sekarang!

Dari materi oleh: Chuck Gallozzi

"Anda tidak akan pernah menang jika Anda tidak pernah memulai."
--Robert H. Schuller--

MENUNDA ITU TUMOR GANAS

Masih ingat "Little House On The Prairie"? Michael Landon, salah satu orang terkenal yang kebetulan mati cepat, pernah mengatakan begini, "Seseorang semestinya mengatakan kepada Kita, segera setelah Kita lahir, bahwa Kita baru saja memulai perjalanan menuju kematian.
Kemudian, Kita jalani kehidupan sampai pada batasnya, setiap menit setiap hari. Lakukan! Apa pun yang ingin Kamu lakukan, lakukanlah sekarang! Apa yang disebut besok jumlahnya tidaklah terlalu banyak."

Ia mengatakan hal itu saat ia menyadari bahwa dirinya mengidap kanker pankreas, di bulan Juli 1991. Ia meninggal di usia 54. Dengan reputasi dan buah karyanya, ia telah menunjukkan kepada Kita bahwa menunda-nunda adalah tumor ganas yang menghambat diri Kita dari pencapaian potensi yang maksimal. Dia telah memilih dirinya untuk menjadi manusia yang bertindak.

Apakah Kita akan menyadarinya, seperti Michael Landon, bahwa kemajuan Kita telah terhambat, bukan oleh apa yang ingin Kita lakukan dan tidak bisa, tapi oleh apa yang Kita inginkan dan tidak Kita lakukan?

BERTINDAK ATAU TIDAK BERTINDAK ADALAH PILIHAN

Mereka yang memilih bertindak, adalah mereka yang memilih untuk hidup. Dan hidup itu sendiri, adalah ekspresi dari berbagai tindakan. Kita selalu bisa memilih untuk bertindak atau tidak bertindak. Kita juga bisa memilih untuk benar atau salah. Kita juga bisa memilih untuk berbuat baik atau hanya merasa baik.

Pengalaman telah mengajari Kita tentang minimnya berbagai hal yang Kita lakukan, sedikitnya hal yang bisa Kita lakukan, banyaknya hal yang Kita lakukan dan banyaknya hal yang bisa Kita lakukan. Makin lama Kita berdiam diri, akan makin sulit bagi Kita untuk merangkak keluar dari pasir penghisap yang makin menenggelamkan. Sementara itu, setiap tindakan benar akan mendorong Kita maju, dan setiap tindakan salah akan menarik Kita mundur. Dengan kata lain:

- Tidak mengambil tindakan mengarah pada kelumpuhan;
- Tindakan yang benar mengarah pada kemajuan; dan
- Tindakan yang salah mengarah pada kemunduran.

Helen Keller, seorang wanita buta yang sukses mendunia, tidak menjadikan kebutaan dan sekaligus ketuliannya sebagai alasan untuk tidak bertindak. Sebaliknya ia berkata, "Saya ini cuma satu, dan
tetaplah akan hanya satu. Saya tidak bisa melakukan segala hal, tapi Saya tetap bisa melakukan berbagai hal; Dan karena Saya tidak bisa melakukan segala hal, Saya tidak akan menolak melakukan berbagai hal yang masih bisa Saya lakukan." Ia mengerti bahwa jika Kita ingin maju, Kita harus memulainya.

KITA TELAH DIBERI SK UNTUK BERKREASI

Pernahkah Anda mendapatkan ide yang bagus? Ya pasti! Kita semua pasti pernah. Tidak ada kata kurang untuk berbagai ide yang bagus. Yang ada adalah kekurangan dalam tindak lanjut.

Banyak dari Kita yang punya ide brilian, tapi gagal mengambil tindakan untuk merealisirnya. Berbagai ide hanya akan menjadi impoten, kecuali jika Kita tiupkan nafas kehidupan ke dalamnya. Sudah
dari sononya, bahwa setiap Kita adalah makhluk kreatif. Dan Kita, tidak sama dengan hewan atau tumbuhan. Manusialah yang diberi kesempatan untuk berkreasi oleh-Nya.

Keberadaan berbagai benda yang berguna di sekitar Kita, menjadi ada dan berguna karena Kita -- manusia dengan izin-Nya, mengkreasinya. Semua itu menjadi kekuatan kemanusiaan, dan kekuatan itu dilahirkan oleh berbagai tindakan.

Kita, bahkan juga diizinkan-Nya untuk 'mengkreasi' diri sendiri. Kelahiran Kita telah dititipi oleh pilihan itu. Kita menjadi berani dengan bertindak berani. Menjadi bersemangat dengan bertindak penuh
semangat. Menjadi mengerti dengan bertindak untuk mengerti. Jika Kita terjebak dalam masalah, tindakan adalah derek yang akan menarik Kita keluar darinya.

Jika Kita terjebak dalam rundung kemalangan, apalagi obatnya jika bukan tindakan?

Apakah nasib Kita disegel oleh berbagai keadaan yang Kita hadapi, atau digerakkan oleh berbagai tindakan yang Kita ambil berdasarkan berbagai situasi itu?

Bagaimana Kita bisa mengalami kenikmatan pencapaian atau rasa kemenangan tanpa tindakan?

Tindakan adalah guru Kita, untuk 'learning by doing'. Melalui tindakanlah Kita bisa mengontrol nasib Kita dengan membentuk masa depan dan menciptakan berbagai alasan untuk keberadaan Kita di dunia, di bawah alasan penciptaan oleh-Nya.

TINDAKAN ADALAH PERUBAHAN

Tindakan akan merubah Kita dari konsumen menjadi kontributor. Setiap tindakan yang Kita ambil adalah goresan kuas dalam lukisan kehidupan Kita. Kekuatan untuk bertindak adalah kekuatan untuk berkreasi. Itulah berkah terbesar untuk umat manusia dari-Nya. Alam semesta adalah simfoni sempurna cintaan-Nya, dan segala tindakan Kita menjadi nada-nada yang mestinya harmoni dengan aransemen-Nya.

Bagaimanakah lagi Kita akan mengetahui rupa akhir lukisan itu, selain dari mengibaskan kuas di atas kanvas?

Lantas, bagaimana Kita harus bertindak?

Ada ungkapan yang cukup bijak dari seorang Henri L. Bergson, "Berpikir sebagai manusia yang bertindak, dan bertindak sebagai manusia yang berpikir." Karena beratnya akibat tindakan Kita atas
dunia dan isinya, Kita harus berpikir sebelum bertindak. Kita harus bertindak dengan penuh tanggung jawab.

Kapan Kita harus bertindak?

Bagaimana dengan rentang waktu antara kemarin dan besok? Tak usah ditunggu yang namanya waktu sempurna, sebab waktu tak akan pernah sempurna sampai Kita mengambil tindakan di dalamnya.

Setiap hembusan nafas Kita diperhitungkan. Setiap hembusan nafas berarti bertahan hidup. Dan tindakan, adalah nafas dari jiwa Kita. Biarkanlah setiap hembusan nafas masuk hitungan.

Jangan campur aduk aktivitas tidak sungguh-sungguh, atau gerakan sederhana dengan TINDAKAN. Aktivitas tak berguna akan menghancurkan waktu, sementara tindakan akan menciptakannya. Menurut Robert L. Stevenson, "Nilailah setiap hari tidak dari panennya, tapi dari bibit yang ditanam." Dan Robert J. Mckain mengatakan, "Konsepsi umum yang berlaku adalah 'motivasi mengarah pada tindakan', padahal yang benar adalah sebaliknya. Tindakanlah yang akan memicu motivasi." Dan jika
Kita muslim, setiap tindakan akan selalu berada di antara dua motivasi.

BERTINDAKLAH SEKARANG!

Kita tidak dijamin untuk sukses atas setiap tindakan yang Kita lakukan. Tapi ingatlah bahwa setiap doa pasti didengar dan dijawab. Sukses tidak bisa dicari dalam keuniversalan, ia ada di dalam
kekhasan. Definisikanlah sasaran dengan tepat, dan pecahlah ia menjadi serangkaian langkah dan tindakan. Lalu: ACTION!

Lupakah Anda, bahwa Andalah sang sutradara?
Source: Milis Bicara


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Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Beberapa dekade lalu, saat Mr Lee senior masih menjadi PM S'pore,dinegara itu pernah terjadi hal yg sangat menghebohkan karena masalah keluarga.Ada orang kaya di sana yg istrinya sudah lama meninggal.

Dia mempunyai seorg anak laki-laki. Dan setelah anak tsb menikah, minta ijin kepada ayahnya utk tinggal bersama.Dan ayahnyapun dgn senang hati mengijinkan anak menantunya tinggal bersama2dengannya di apartmentnnya yg luas dan mewah.Ayahnya ini sgt mencintai anak tunggalnya, dan krn dia merasa sdh tua, maka dia menghibahkan seluruh harta kekayaan termasuk apartment yg mrk tinggali, diatasnamakan ke anaknya itu.

Tahun2 berlalu, seperti biasa, masalah klasik dlm rumah tangga, jika anak menantu tinggal seatap dgn org tua, entah sebab mengapa, suatu hari mrk bertengkar hebat, yg pada akhirnya, anaknya mengusir ayahnya keluar dr apartment mrk. Krn seluruh hartanya sdh diberikan kpd anaknya, mulai hari itu dia menjadi pengemis di Orchard Road.

Bayangkan, org kaya dan terkenal di Spore, tiba2 menjadi pengemis!Suatu hari, ada temannya wkt mau memberikan sedekah, dia langsung mengenali si ayah ini dan menanyakan kepadanya, apakah anda Mr. X. Tentu saja, si ayah malu dan menjawab bukan.Tetapi temannya curiga dan yakin, bhw Mr X itu adalah temannya yg sudah beberapa lama tdk ada kabar beritanya.

Kemudian, temannya ini mengabarkan hal ini kpd teman2nya yg lain, dan mereka bersama2 mendatangi si ayah.Ada 1 sahabat karibnya yg langsung yakin bahwa pengemis itu adalah Mr X. Dan dihadapan para sahabatnya, si ayah dgn menangis tersedu2, dia menceritakan semua kejadian yg sdh dialaminya.

Maka, terjadilah kegemparan di sana, karena semua orang tua merasa sangat marah terhadap anak yg sangat tidak berbudi itu.Kegemparan ini akhirnya terdengar sampai ke PM Lee. PM Lee sangat marah dan langsung memanggil anak & menantu si ayah. Ke 2 org tsb dimaki2 dan dimarahi habis2an oleh PM Lee dan PM Lee mengatakan "sangat memalukan bahwa di spore ada anak put hauw seperti mereka" .

Lalu PM Lee memanggil notaris dan saat itu jg surat hibah itu dibatalkan demi hukum! Dan surat hibah yg a.n. anaknya tsb disobek2 oleh PM Lee. Sehingga semua harta milik si ayah diatasnamakan Mr X lagi. Lalu, anak menantu itu sejak saat itu dilarang masuk ke apartment ayahnya.Mr Lee ini ternyata terkenal sebagai org yg sangat berbakti kpd org tuanya dan menghargai para lansia.

Sehingga, agar kejadian serupa tidak terulang lg, Mr Lee mengeluarkan dekrit yaitu larangan kepada para org tua utk tidak menghibahkan harta bendanya kepada siapapun sebelum mereka meninggal. Kemudian, agar para lansia itu tetap dihormati dan dihargai hingga akhir hayatnya, maka dia buat dekrit lg, yaitu memberi pekerjaan kpd para lansia.

Agar para lansia ini tdk tergantung kpd anak menantunya dan mempunyai penghasilan sendiri dan mereka sangat bangga bisa memberi angpao kpd cucu-cucunya dr hasil keringat mereka sendiri selama 1 thn bekerja. Yaitu dgn cara, semua toilet di Changi Airport, mall, restaurant, petugas cleaning service adalah para lansia.

Jadi selain para lansia itu juga bahagia karena di usia tua mereka masih bisa bekerja, jg mereka bisa bersosialisasi dan sehat karena banyak bergerak. Kenapa mereka tidak diberi pekerjaan di kantor dsbnya? itu tidak mungkin! karena lansia itu bukan orang yg berpendidikan tinggi dan sebagian besar adalah mantan ibu2 rumah tangga 100%.

Dan juga memberikan pendidikan sosial yg sangat bagus buat anak2 dan remaja di sana, bahwa pekerjaan membersihkan toilet, meja makan diresto dsbnya itu bukan pekerjaan hina. sehigga anak2 tsb dr kecil diajarkan untuk tahu menghargai org yg lebih tua.


Blogged on 1:56 AM by Upay

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Sunday, April 30, 2006

The Man Who Didn't Like The Sun

The man hated the bright burning thing in the sky. It hovered over him all day long, no matter where he went. He hated the Sun's harsh light, the heat it created and the shadows it cast on the earth around him. He felt like the sun was stealing something from him, separating him from things when what he craved was unity."

At least at night everything looks the same," he thought.That's why he liked the darkness. The Sun had become his enemy.One day, unable to stand it any longer, he decided to dig a hole to protect himself from the intolerable rays of sunlight.

His skin, which had been burned a deep brown, began to turn white again, and the shadows of day ceased to annoy him. But then, sitting in his hole, he realized that the sun continued to flood his hiding place with light from above, and that his shelter was even brighter than the land outside.

He went back to work and had soon dug himself a tunnel and a cave. And there he finally found protection from the Sun. He spent years in his hole, meditating in solitude, in the coolness of the dark where the Sun never penetrated.

Up on the surface other men grew food and warmed themselves in the heat of the all-giving star. They saw the Sun as a good and protecting God. The Sun was their ally as they learned to tame its extremes. They lived through the seasons, one after the other.All were thankful for the Sun's presence, all except for the man who wanted to avoid the light and the contrasts it created.

In the end the poor hermit perished in his cave, in darkness, in the calmness and unity of the shadows, but desperate and alone.And after he died the people didn't even have to dig a grave for him. It was already there...


Blogged on 6:16 AM by Upay

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Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Random Act Of Kindness Saved Pinoy In Nigeria

IT was what any prudent person in a strange and restive land would have done.And Anthony Santos, a 36-year-old Filipino worker then stationed in Nigeria's oil-rich Delta State, did accordingly when a group of weary fishermen stopped by his company barge one day.

The group asked Anthony if he could spare some food-and soon enough he was handing over slices of bread from the vessel's stock.It was a random act of kindness in just another encounter with the impoverished locals in Anthony's two years of working in the Niger Delta. He had actually forgotten all about it.Until a black-masked man wielding a machine gun reminded him last month.

On Feb. 18, a militant group opposing oil activities in the Niger Delta abducted Anthony and eight other foreigners employed by the US oil service firm Willbros, holding them hostage in a jungle hideaway for almost two weeks.The other captives were three Americans, two Britons, two Thais and an Egyptian.A subplot unfolded beneath the international crisis, showing how the Filipino knack for making friends and generating goodwill served Anthony well during this chilling episode in his life as an overseas worker.

One of the kidnappers, it turned out, was also one of the famished fishermen whom Anthony had helped.The man recognized Anthony among the captives, and assured the Filipino that "nobody among the other kidnappers could touch him," according to accounts gathered by the Inquirer from the Department of Foreign Affairs and from Anthony's wife Helen.He regarded Anthony as someone he should "protect" in case his comrades decided to make good their threat to torture or kill any of the hostages.

The Philippine Embassy in Abuja spoke with Anthony shortly after he was released by his abductors on March 1.The embassy reported: "Anthony revealed that a small gesture of his in the past helped sustain him in the difficult and tense moments [of his] captivity."It was discovered that he had given food to some fisher folk who passed by their barge months before, and it just so happened that one of the beneficiaries of his act of charity [was] one of the kidnappers."The embassy said one kidnapper "safeguarded Anthony the whole time and spared him from any injury."It said the young man told Anthony that the other kidnappers might have to kill him first before they got to the Filipino.Anthony thus felt "restless on the days when his friend was not around," the embassy said.

How it happened

The kidnappers were mainly youths in their 20s belonging to the Movement for the Emancipation of the Niger Delta (MEND).Per the embassy report, Anthony and his coworkers were kidnapped "in retaliation" for the Nigerian military's bombardment of tribal communities suspected of illegal bunkering operations.

At the time of the kidnapping, the Willbros crew was conducting pipe-laying operations around a Shell oil terminal in Warri City.The heavily armed MEND militants forced their way into the Willbros barge at about 8 a.m. of Feb. 18. Anthony, who had worked the night shift, was awakened by gunshots.He and his coworkers were ordered to board a speedboat.

About an hour later they found themselves in a forested area near a swamp, where they were held in a "camp" that was powered by an electric generator and had a television set.

Trauma

Anthony, a father of two, returned to Manila on March 4, or three days after he and five of the other hostages were freed.

The Inquirer reached the family home in Olongapo City but Helen Santos took the call, saying her husband was still too "traumatized" to talk about his ordeal.She said he had been seeing a psychiatrist since his homecoming.Nevertheless, Helen agreed to share what Anthony had so far told her.Contrary to earlier reports that the hostages were not physically harmed, Anthony was actually "hit hard on the right ear" during the abduction.He is also being treated for that injury, which left him hard of hearing during his days in captivity.

Anthony had forgotten about giving food to a group of fishermen until one of the kidnappers barked at him: "I recognize you!"Helen confirmed the embassy report about the "friendly" militant offering to be killed first before the others could lay a hand on her husband.The kidnapper-who appeared to be the group leader-made sure that his brothers in arms knew the little history he shared with the Filipino hostage.

Torment

This somehow helped Anthony cope with the psychological torment that he and the others were forced to endure.For example, the kidnappers often cleaned their guns or fired a few test rounds in front of the hostages, playfully pointing the firearms in the latter's direction.The kidnappers also spoke loudly in broken English about the plan to blindfold the hostages, hang them from a tree, and shoot them."But after a few minutes, they would say they would not really do it," Helen said.

The hostages were fed-usually eggs or noodles-twice a day. They were given new clothes on their third day in the camp.On the day Anthony was released, his "friend" was not in the camp. Thus, no goodbyes were said.
Anthony got his name but would not disclose it for security reasons, Helen said.Well-liked"Filipinos, I heard, are actually well-liked by the local people in those parts," Helen said.
"Perhaps my husband, who can pass for a Mexican, was only dragged into this because he was mistaken for a member of another foreign nationality."She said her own father, younger brother and a brother-in-law were still working with Anthony's firm in Nigeria.

Anthony himself told airport reporters that he was willing to go back to work in the West African nation despite what had happened, to be able to continue supporting his family.Before working overseas for the last 12 years, Anthony was a crew member of a doughnut shop in Dau, Pampanga.

The shop closed in the wake of the Mt. Pinatubo eruptions.He also previously worked for construction firms in Dubai in the Middle East, and in Louisiana in the United States.Wherever his next stint will be, Anthony has more than a survivor's tale to tell and a battered ear to show from his days in Nigeria."

He said so himself: It seems like any thing good you have done, no matter how small, finds a way to give you something in return," Helen said.


Blogged on 7:55 PM by Upay

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Wednesday, February 08, 2006

An old man lived in a certain part of London, and he would wake up every morning and go to the subway. He would get the train right to Central London, and then sit at the street corner and beg. He would do this every single day of his life. He sat at the same street corner and begged for almost 20 years.

His house was filthy, and a stench came out of the house and it smelled horribly. The neighbors could not stand the smell anymore, so they summoned the police officers to clear the place. The officers knocked down the door and cleaned the house. There were small bags of money all over the house that he had collected over the years. The police counted the money, and they soon realized that the old man was a millionaire. They waited outside his house in anticipation to share the good news with him. When he arrived home that evening, he was met by one the officers who told him that there was no need for him to beg any more as he was a rich man now, a millionaire.

He said nothing at all; he went into his house and locked the door. The next morning he woke up as usual, went to the subway, got into the train, and sat at the street corner and continued to beg.

Obviously, this old man had no great plans, dreams or anything significant for his life. We learn nothing from this story other than staying focused on the things we enjoy doing, commitment.

We should remain true to our course; which may mean committing yourselves to things that people around you would normally disapprove. Let nothing distract us from being happy, let nothing else determine our fate, but ourselves.

What makes us happy is what matters in the end, not what we acquire.


source: unknown



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Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Parable of the Pencil


Source unknown

The pencil maker took the pencil aside just before putting him into the box.There are 5 things you need to know, he told the pencil before I end you out into the world. Always remember them and never forget and you will become the best pencil you can be.

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One:
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You will be able to do many great things , but only if you allow yourself to be held in someone's hand.

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Two:
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You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, but you will need it to become a better pencil.

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Three:
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You will be able to correct any mistakes you might make.

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Four:
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The most important part of you will always be what is inside.

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Five:
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On every surface you are used on , you must leave your mark. No matter what the condition , you must continue to write.

The pencil understood and promised to remember and went into the box with purpose in its heart.



Blogged on 1:49 AM by Upay

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Sunday, October 23, 2005

PETTY ANNOYANCES

Much time is wasted agitating over petty annoyances. Getting caught intraffic, someone saying an unkind word or two or a sale falling throughcan send some people into a tizzy where they sacrifice their productivepotential by focusing on their petty annoyances.The survivors of Hurricane Katrina long for the day of just dealing withpetty annoyances.“I cried because I had no shoes until I met the man who had no feet.”No day is worth wasting over petty annoyances.


Blogged on 1:43 AM by Upay

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Letting Go Of Wooden Apples

The Monkey with the Wooden ApplesThere once was a happy monkey wandering the jungle, eating delicious fruit when hungry, and resting when tired. One day he came upon a house, where he saw a bowl of the most beautiful apples. He took one in each hand and ran back into the forest.He sniffed the apples and smelled nothing. He tried to eat them, but hurt his teeth. They were made of wood, but they were beautiful, and when the other monkeys saw them, he held onto them even tighter.

He admired his new possessions proudly as he wandered the jungle. They glistened red in the sun, and seemed perfect to him. He became so attached to them, that he didn't even notice his hunger at first.

A fruit tree reminded him, but he felt the apples in his hands. He couldn't bear to set them down to reach for the fruit. In fact, he couldn't relax, either, if he was to defend his apples. A proud, but less happy monkey continued to walk along the forest trails.The apples became heavier, and the poor little monkey thought about leaving them behind. He was tired, hungry, and he couldn't climb trees or collect fruit with his hands full.

What if he just let go?Letting go of such valuable things seemed crazy, but what else could he do? He was so tired. Seeing the next fruit tree, and smelling it's fruit was enough. He dropped the wooden apples and reached up for his meal. He was happy again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~Letting Go Of Wooden Apples~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Like that little monkey, we sometimes carry things that seem too valuable to let go. A man carries an image of himself as "productive" - carries it like a shiny wooden apple. But in reality, his busyness leaves him tired, and hungry for a better life. Still, letting go seems crazy. Even his worries are sacred apples - they prove he's "doing everything he can." He holds onto them compulsively.

This is a hard thing to see. We identify so strongly with our things even, feeling pain when our cars are dented. How much more powerfully do we identify with our beliefs and self-ideas? Yet they don't always feed our souls, do they? And we become tired of defending them.How else could the story end?

The monkey might be found dead of hunger, under a beautiful tree, with fruit within reach, but still grasping his wooden apples.I chose to end it with him letting go, because only with open hands can we receive.


Blogged on 1:22 AM by Upay

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The blue ribbon's story......

A professor was in the habit of giving his students a little gift at the end of the school year - a blue ribbon with the words "Who I Am Makes A difference" printed in gold letters on the ribbon.

As she gave each student their ribbon she explained why he had appreciated teaching them, and why his course had been different because that particular student had been present.

One day it occurred to her to see what effect this little custom would have on the community. She gave each student 3 blue ribbons instead of one, and told each of them to give one ribbon to someone they knew who, in their opinion "made a difference."She also told them to give the 2 other ribbons to that same person, with instructions to hand them out to others who had made a difference.

After that the students were to come back and report what happened.One student who had a part-time job gave his ribbon to his boss, a grumpy fellow who nevertheless appreciated the honor."I admire everything you've done," the student said to his boss. "I think you're a creative genius and a real fair guy. Will you allow me to pin this blue ribbon on your jacket as a sign of my appreciation?"The boy's boss was surprised but also pleased. "Yeah, sure, why not?" he said."And will you take these 2 other ribbons," the student continued,” and give them to someone you think makes a difference, like I did for you? It's for a project we're doing at school.""All right," the boss replied.

That night the boss returned home wearing the blue ribbon on his jacket. He greeted his 14 year old son and said,” Something strange happened to me today. One of my employees gave me this ribbon. See what's written on it? 'Because you make a difference.’ He gave me another ribbon just like it and told me to give it to someone who's made a difference for me, someone who is very special and means a lot to me."I had a pretty hard day, but on the way home I said to myself,' There's only one person I want to give this ribbon to.' I know I tell you off a lot because you don't work hard enough at school, because all you think about is going out and having fun with your friends, because your room's always a mess... But tonight I want to tell you that you are very very important to me. You and your mother make all the difference in my life, and I'd like you to accept this blue ribbon as a sign of my love. I don't tell you I love you very often, not nearly enough, I know. But I do love you, and I think you're a wonderful kid!"

As soon as he stopped talking his son burst into tears. His whole body shook with sobs. His father took him in his arms and held him close, saying, "That's okay, it's all right. Did I say something wrong?""No Dad." his son replied, "It's just that... I decided I was going to kill myself. I was going to do it tomorrow. I had it all planned out. I wanted to kill myself because I was sure you didn't like me, even though I tried hard to be good. Now that's all changed..."


Blogged on 12:01 AM by Upay

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Thursday, October 20, 2005

THE WISE WOMAN

Author Unknown

A wise woman who was traveling in the mountains found a precious stone in a stream.

The next day she met another traveler who was hungry, and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food. The hungry traveler saw the precious stone and asked the woman to give it to him. She did so without hesitation.
The traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune. He knew the stone was worth enough to give him security for a lifetime.

But, a few days later, he came back to return the stone to the wise woman. "I've been thinking," he said. "I know how valuable this stone is, but I give it back in the hope that you can give me something even more precious. Give me what you have within you that enabled you to give me this stone."



Blogged on 8:11 AM by Upay

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Sunday, October 16, 2005

Sand and Stone

Two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey they had an argument, and one friend slapped the other one in the face. The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand: "TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE."

They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one, who had been slapped, got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him. After the friend recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone: "TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE."

The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, "After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on a stone, why?"

The other friend replied: "When someone hurts us, we should write it down in sand where winds of forgiveness can erase it away. But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it."

LEARN TO WRITE YOUR HURTS IN THE SAND, AND TO CARVE YOUR BENEFITS IN STONE



Blogged on 3:36 PM by Upay

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Big John

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along his route. No problems for the first few stops -- a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well.

At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said, "Big John doesn't pay!" And he sat down at the back.

Did I mention that the driver was five feet three, thin, and basically meek? Well, he was. Naturally, he didn't argue with Big John, but he wasn't happy about it.

The next day the same thing happened -- Big John got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And he did the same thing the next day, and the one after that, and so forth.

This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him. Finally he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff. By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong -- what's more, he felt really good about himself.

So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got on the bus and said, "Big John doesn't pay!," the driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed, "Oh yeah…and why not?"

With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, "Big John has a bus pass."

Moral of the story:

Be sure there really is a problem before working hard to solve it.



Blogged on 3:28 PM by Upay

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My mom only had one eye.

I hated her... she was such an embarrassment...She cooked for students & teachers...to support the family. There was this one day during elementary school and my mom came. I was so embarrassed. How could she do this to me? I threw her a hateful look and ran out.

The next day at school... Your mom only has one eye?!?!"...eeeee said a friend. I wished my mom would just disappear from this world. So I said to my mom, "Mom... Why don't you have the other eye?! If you're only gonna make me a laughing stock, why don't you just die?!!!"

My mom did not respond... I guess I felt a little bad, but at the same time, it felt good to think that I had said what I'd wanted to say all this time... Maybe it was because my mom hadn't punished me, but I didn't think that I had hurt her feelings very badly.

That night... I woke up, and went to the kitchen to get a glass of water. My mom was crying there, so quietly, as if she was afraid that she might wake me. I took a look at her, and then turned away. Because of the thing I had said to her earlier, there was something pinching at me in the corner of my heart. Even so, I hated my mother who was crying out of her one eye. So I told myself that I would grow up and become successful.

Then I studied real hard. I left my mother and went to Singapore to study. Then, I got married. I bought a house of my own. Then I had kids, too... Now I'm living happily as a successful man. I like it here because it's a place that doesn’t remind me of my mom.

This happiness was getting bigger and bigger, when...

What?! Who's this? It was my mother...Still with her one eye. I felt as if the whole sky was falling apart on me. Even my children ran away, scared of my mom's eye. And I asked her, "Who are you?!" "I don't know you!" (As if I was trying to make that real. I screamed at her, "How dare you come to my house and scare my children!"

GET OUT OF HERE, NOW!"

And to this, my mother quietly answered, "Oh, I'm so sorry. I may have gotten the wrong address," and she disappeared out of sight.

Thank good ness... She doesn't recognize me. I was quite relieved. I told myself that I wasn't going to care, or think about this for the rest of my life. Then a wave of relief came upon me...

One day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house in Singapore. So, lying to my wife that I was going on a business trip, I went. After the reunion, I went down to the old shack, which I used to call a house... Just out of curiosity. There, I found my mother fallen on the cold ground. But I did not shed a single tear. She had a piece of paper in her hand.... It was a letter to me.

"My son... I think my life has been long enough now...and...I won’t visit Singapore anymore... But would it be too much to ask if I wanted you to come visit me once in a while? I miss you so much. And I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion. But I decided not to go to the school. For you...and I'm sorry that I only have one eye, and I was an embarrassment for you.

You see, when you were very little, you got into an accident, and lost your eye. As a mom, I couldn't stand watching you having to grow up with only one eye... So I gave you mine... I was so proud of my son that was seeing a whole new world for me, in my place, with that eye. I was never upset at you for anything you did... The couple times that you were angry with me... I thought to myself, 'It's because he loves me...'

"My son... Oh, my son..."

This message has a very deep meaning and is passed to remind people of the goodness they have enjoy was because of others directly or indirectly. Pause a moment and consider your life! Be thankful of what you have today compared to many millions who do not live lives as you do!



Blogged on 3:17 PM by Upay

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How Companies Got their Name !


Apple Computers

It was the favourite fruit of founder Steve Jobs. He was three months late in filing a name for the business, and he threatened to call his company Apple Computers if the other colleagues didn't suggest a better name by 5 O'clock.

CISCO

It is not an acronym as popularly believed. It is short for San Francisco.

Compaq

This name was formed by using COMp, for computer, and PAQ to denote a small
integral object.

Corel

The name was derived from the founder's name Dr.Michael Cowpland. It stands for COwpland REsearch Laboratory.

Google

The name started as a joke boasting about the amount of information the search-engine would be able to search. It was originally named 'Googol', a word for the number represented by 1 followed by 100 zeros.After founders -Stanford graduate students Sergey Brin and Larry Page presented their project to an angel investor, they received a cheque made out to 'Google'

Hotmail

Founder Jack Smith got the idea of accessing e-mail via the web from a computer anywhere in the world.When Sabeer Bhatia came up with the business plan for the mail service, he tried all kinds of names ending in 'mail' and finally settled for hotmail as it included the letters "html" - the programming language used to write web pages. It was initially referred to as HoTMaiL with selective uppercasing.

Hewlett Packard

Bill Hewlett and Dave Packard tossed a coin to decide whether the company they founded would be called Hewlett-Packard or Packard-Hewlett.

Intel

Bob Noyce and Gordon Moore wanted to name their new company 'Moore Noyce' but that was already trademarked by a hotel chain so they had to settle for an acronym of INTegrated ELectronics.

Lotus (Notes)

Mitch Kapor got the name for his company from 'The Lotus Position' or 'Padmasana'. Kapor used to be a teacher of Transcendental Meditation of Maharishi Mahesh Yogi.

Microsoft

Coined by Bill Gates to represent the company that was devoted to MICROcomputer SOFTware. Originally christened Micro-Soft, the '-' was removed later on.

Motorola

Founder Paul Galvin came up with this name when his company started manufacturing radios for cars. The popular radio company at the time was called Victrola.

ORACLE

Larry Ellison and Bob Oats were working on a consulting project for the CIA (Central Intelligence Agency). The code name for the project was called Oracle (the CIA saw this as the system to give answers to all questions or something such). The project was designed to help use the newly written SQL code by IBM. The project eventually was terminated but Larry and Bob decided to finish what they started and bring it to the world. They kept the name Oracle and created the RDBMS engine. Later they kept the same name for the company.

Sony

It originated from the Latin word 'sonus' meaning sound, and 'sonny' a slang used by Americans to refer to a bright youngster.

SUN

Founded by 4 Stanford University buddies, SUN is the acronym for Stanford University Network. Andreas Bechtolsheim built a microcomputer; Vinod Khosla recruited him and Scott McNealy to manufacture computers based on it, and Bill Joy to develop a UNIX-based OS for the computer.

Yahoo!

The word was invented by Jonathan Swift and used in his book 'Gulliver's Travels'. It represents a person who is repulsive in appearance and action and is barely human. Yahoo! Founders Jerry Yang and David Filo selected the name because they considered themselves yahoos


Blogged on 2:31 PM by Upay

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Friday, September 30, 2005

The Man Who Didn't Like The Sun


The man hated the bright burning thing in the sky. It hovered over him all day long, no matter where he went. He hated the Sun's harsh light, the heat it created and the shadows it cast on the earth around him.He felt like the sun was stealing something from him, separating him from things when what he craved was unity.

"At least at night everything looks the same," he thought. hat's why he liked the darkness. The Sun had become his enemy.

One day, unable to stand it any longer, he decided to dig a hole to protect himself from the intolerable rays of sunlight. His skin, which had been burned a deep brown, began to turn white again, and the shadows of day ceased to annoy him. But then, sitting in his hole, he realized that the sun continued to flood his hiding place with light from above, and that his shelter was even brighter than the land outside.

He went back to work and had soon dug himself a tunnel and a cave. And there he finally found protection from the Sun. He spent years in his hole, meditating in solitude, in the coolness of the dark where the Sun never penetrated. Up on the surface other men grew food and warmed themselves in the heat of the all-giving star. They saw the Sun as a good and protecting God. The Sun was their ally as they learned to tame its extremes. They lived through the seasons, one after the other.

All were thankful for the Sun's presence, all except for the man who wanted to avoid the light and the contrasts it created. In the end the poor hermit perished in his cave, in darkness, in the calmness and unity of the shadows, but desperate and alone.

And after he died the people didn't even have to dig a grave for him.

It was already there...


Moral of the Story:

Accepting people's differences, living with others and their strange habits and sometimes incomprehensible behaviour, can be difficult. We are often tempted to retreat like a hermit into the calmness of home, into the shadows. But life is composed of diversity, of exchange and of change. When you cut yourself off from your friends, your neighbours and your community, you also lose a part of yourself.



Blogged on 4:54 AM by Upay

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Monday, September 26, 2005

The simple ideas of The Four Agreements provide an inspirational code for life; a personal development model, and a template for personal development, behavior, communications and relationships.


Here is how Don Miguel Ruiz summarizes 'The Four Agreements': code for life

agreement 1
be impeccable with your word - Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

Agreement 2
don’t take anything personally - Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.

Agreement 3
don’t make assumptions - Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

Agreement 4
Always do your best - Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.



Blogged on 2:37 AM by Upay

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Saturday, September 24, 2005

An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy. "It is a terrible fight between two wolves.

"One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, greed, regret, lies, self-pity, arrogance, guilt, resentment, inferiority, false pride, superiority and ego.

"The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.

"This same fight is going on inside you -- and inside every other person, too."

The grandson thought for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"

The old Cherokee replied, "The one you feed."



Blogged on 2:36 PM by Upay

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Friday, September 23, 2005


For anyone who has ever been troubled by the lone sock left at the end of the laundry, help is on the way, and it comes in the form of indignation: Who ever said socks had to come in pairs? At least that is the rebellious philosophy of one sock manufacturer who is single handedly trying to change the way we see the sock problem. "The missing sock is never going to go away," said one of the company's founders. "This is a way to really have fun with a real-world problem: that people lose their socks… Let's embrace the problem, and run with it." Currently they have in circulation over 600,000 socks, all sold without matches in packages of 1, 3, or 7.

Type A personalities aside, the embracing of mismatched socks is catching on quickly. I happen to think the idea is clever, particularly among the target market (girls age 9-13), but I also think it is one more logical outworking of the current philosophical frame of mind. "Imbalance by design—and the studied quirkiness it reveals—is everywhere," notes one cultural observer. "Random is the new order," declares another product aimed at teens. Whether selling music or socks, in the constant undertow of marketing, the spirit and mood of the age can be felt.

Leon Lederman, the physicist and Nobel laureate, once jokingly remarked that the real goal of physics was to come up with an equation that could explain the universe but still be small enough to fit on a T-shirt. With this challenge in mind, Oxford scientist Richard Dawkins offered up his own T-shirt slogan: "Life results from the non-random survival of randomly varying replicators." The universe, he insists, has neither design nor purpose; it exhibits nothing but blind pitiless indifference.

But if the universe has always been a disordered series of time plus matter plus chance, how do we account for the intricate orderedness to life, the uniformity of nature, the very intricacy of the mind that asks this question? How can we believe in the non-random consistency of nature in a random world? What would it really look like if random was the new order? Even in the nonconforming concept of mismatched socks, the factories making them still exhibit a scrupulous degree of order; each random sock is designed and produced with creativity and intent.



Blogged on 2:29 AM by Upay

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Monday, September 19, 2005

Socrates' Triple filter

In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Do you know what I just heard about your friend?"

"Before telling me anything, I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test" Socrates replied.

"Triple filter?"

"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you're going to say. That's why I call it the triple filter test. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"

"No," the man said, "Actually I just heard about it and..."

"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?"

"No, on the contrary..."

"So," Socrates continued, "You want to tell me something bad about him, but you're not certain it's true. You may still pass the test though, because there's one filter left: the filter of usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really."

"Well," concluded Socrates, "If what you want to tell me is neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"


Blogged on 8:06 PM by Upay

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Wednesday, March 02, 2005

1. - First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one:

"What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

"Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello."

I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.


2. - Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the Rain

One night, at 11:30 P.M., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached. It read:

"Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away... God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."

Sincerely,
Mrs. Nat King Cole.


3. - Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve.


In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.

"How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked.

"Fifty cents," replied the waitress. The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it.

"Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.

By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient.

"Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.

The little boy again counted his coins.

"I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.

The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies..

You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.


4. - Fourth Important Lesson. - The obstacle in Our Path.

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing ! and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand!

Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.


5. - Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts...

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare & serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little bro! there, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister.

I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded.

He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away".

Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.


Blogged on 3:02 PM by Upay

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Thursday, July 22, 2004

Once upon a time, there was an island where all the feelings lived: Happiness, Sadness, Knowledge, and all of the others, including Love.

One day it was announced to the feelings that the island would sink, so all constructed boats and left. Except for Love.

Love was the only one who stayed. Love wanted to hold out until the last possible moment. When the island had almost sunk, Love decided to ask for help.


Richness was passing by Love in a grand boat. Love said,"Richness, can you take me with you?"
Richness answered, "No, I can't. There is a lot of gold and silver in my boat. There is no place here for you."


Love decided to ask Vanity who was also passing by in a beautiful vessel. "Vanity, please help me!"
"I can't help you, Love. You are all wet and might damage my boat," Vanity answered.


Sadness was close by so Love asked, "Sadness, let me go with you."
"Oh . . . Love, I am so sad that I need to be by myself!"


Happiness passed by Love, too, but she was so happy that she did not even hear when Love called her.


Suddenly, there was a voice, "Come, Love, I will take you." It was an elder. So blessed and overjoyed, Love even forgot to ask the elder where they were going. When they arrived at dry land, the elder went her own way.


Realizing how much was owed the elder,


Love asked Knowledge, another elder, "Who Helped me?"
"It was Time," Knowledge answered.
"Time?" asked Love. "But why did Time help me?"
Knowledge smiled with deep wisdom and answered,

"Because only Time is capable of understanding how valuable Love is."



unknown


Blogged on 9:43 PM by Upay

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A long time ago, before the world was created and humans set foot on it for the first time, and vices floated around and were bored, not knowing what to do.

One day, all the vices and virtues were gathered together and were more bored than ever. Suddenly, Ingenious came up with an idea: "Let's play hide and seek!"

All of them liked the idea and immediately Madness shouted: "I want to count, I want to count!" And since nobody was crazy enough to want to seek Madness, all the others agreed.

Madness leaned against a tree and started to count: "One, two, three..."

As Madness counted, the vices and virtues went hiding.
Tenderness hung itself on the horn of the moon...
Treason hid in a pile of garbage...
Fondness curled up between the clouds...and
Passion went to the centre of the earth....
Lie said that it would hide under a stone, but hid at the bottom of the lake... whilst Avarice entered a sack that he ended up breaking.
And Madness continued to count: .... "seventy nine, eighty, eighty one..."

By this time, all the vices and virtues were already hidden - except Love. For undecided as Love is, he could not decide where to hide. And this should not surprise us, because we all know how difficult it is to hide Love.

Madness: "...ninety five, ninety six, ninety seven..."

Just when Madness got to one hundred.........Love jumped into a rose bush where he hid.

And Madness turned around and shouted: "I'm coming, I'm coming!"

As Madness turned around, Laziness was the first to be found, because Laziness had no energy to hide. Then he spotted Tenderness in the horn of the moon, Lie at the bottom of the lake and Passion at the centre of the earth. One by one, Madness found them all - except Love.

Madness was getting desperate, unable to find Love.

Envious of Love, Envy whispered to Madness: "You only need to find Love and Love is hiding in the rose bush."

Madness grabbed a wooden pitch fork and stabbed wildly at the rosebush. Madness stabbed and stabbed until a heartbreaking cry made him stop.

Love appeared from the rose bush, covering his face with his hands. Between his fingers ran two trickles of blood from his eyes.

Madness, so anxious to find Love, had stabbed out Love's eyes with a pitch fork. "What have I done! What have I done!" Madness shouted. "I have left you blind! How can I repair it?"

And Love answered: "You cannot repair my eyes. But if you want to do something for me, you can be my guide."

And so it came about that from that day on, Love is blind and is always accompanied by Madness.


@story I got fr my romantic-thoughtful friend: Jawahar-c-Adityan..love all of ur works, dude!



Blogged on 9:20 PM by Upay

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Tuesday, June 29, 2004

quoted from unknown


I believe - that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.


I believe - that no matter how good a friend is they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.


I believe - that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.


I believe - that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.


I believe - that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.


I believe - that you can keep going long after you can't.


I believe - that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.


I believe - that either you control your attitude or it controls you.


I believe - that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.


I believe - that money is a lousy way of keeping score.


I believe - that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time! .


I believe - that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.


I believe - that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.


I believe - that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.


I believe - that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.


I believe - that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.


I believe - that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.


I believe - that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.


I believe - that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.


I believe - that your life can be changed in a matter of hour's by people who don't even know you.


I believe - that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.



Blogged on 8:24 AM by Upay

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Monday, June 28, 2004

by anonym

A young wife sat on a sofa in Bukit Timah on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother.

As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes
in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter,

"Don't forget your girlfriends," she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. "They'll be more important as you get older, No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you'll have, you are still going to need girlfriends. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them. And remember that "girlfriends" are not only your friends, but your sisters, your daughters, and other relatives too. You'll need other women. Women always do."

'What a funny piece of advice,' the young woman thought. 'Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman for goodness sake, a grownup, not a young girl who needs girlfriends! Surely my husband and the family we'll start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!'

But she listened to her Mother; she kept contact with her girlfriends and made more each year. As the years tumbled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her Mom really knew what she was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, girlfriends are the mainstays of her life.

After 50 years of living in this world, here is what I've learned:
Times passes. Life happens. Distance separates. Children grow up. Love waxes and wanes. Hearts break. Careers end. Jobs come and go. Parents die. Colleagues forget favours. Men don't call when they say they will...

BUT girlfriends are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you, A girlfriend is never farther away than needing her can reach. When you have to walk that lonesome valley, and you have to walk it for yourself, your girlfriends will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you. Or come in and carry you out.

My daughter, sisters, mother, sisters-in-law, mother-in-law, aunties, nieces, cousins, extended family, and friends bless my life! The world wouldn't be the same without them, and neither would I. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other. Every day, we need each other still.



Blogged on 6:29 AM by Upay

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Monday, June 14, 2004

Oprah’s show hari ini dengan tema « searching for the most romantic man » benar-benar mengharu biru. Salah satu lelaki terpilih digambarkan sebagai seorang yang sangat romantis dengan tetap kokoh di samping kekasihnya yang terserang kanker payudara. Saking penuh perhatiannya, tiap kali berangkat kerja, selalu saja ia kembali sejenak, sekilas melihat kekasih hatinya sekali lagi.

Tiap hari, tak lupa secarik memo dan kartu-kartu ia selipkan. Ungkapan cinta dan terima kasih, karena bersedia membersihkan rumah. Kata-kata seperti “she is everything to me. Every breath I take, is dedicated for Lisa..” bertebaran di mana-mana.

Yeah..yeah..
Romantisme memang mengagungkan, melenakan. Membawa orang ke dunia lain..kelimpungan..melayang-layang. Aku jadi ingat ungkapan teman yang akan menikah untuk kedua kalinya di usia bawah 30 tahun…
“Pernikahan ini, Pay..luar biasa..melambung, melenting dalam deburan ombak ..membawaku menggeragas ke angkasa”
Luar biasa. Dia sedang berada pada fase euphoria, rupanya. Jadi kubiarkan saja.

Dalam budaya yang porak poranda ini, ada pergerakan baru dalam tiap hubungan antar manusia. Di satu sisi, perselingkuhan, stand night party, perceraian, perpisahan merupakan hal-hal yang biasa dan lumrah. Namun dunia juga menyisakan orang-orang yang mengikat hati nuraninya, pada sebuah kesetiaan, dedikasi penuh. Berada di tengah-tengah kebimbangan, antara lust dan love yang sangat, sangat tipis.

Semua itu membawaku berkelana pada sebuah tanya, apakah kebahagiaan itu ? Apakah percintaan, helaan nafas memang harusnya didedikasikan pada satu suara ?

Aku baca berulang-ulang tulisan yang dibuat oleh Harun Yahya, penulis produktif Turki yang luar biasa itu. Membuatku mati rasa pada romantisme yang aku saksikan tiap-tiap hari. Untuk yang tertarik artikelnya, email me
Tapi manusia memang diijinkan untuk bersikap lemah. Ia memang dilahirkan dengan cacat menetap itu: bersifat lalai dan cenderung memperturutkan hawa nafsu. Mungkin itu mengapa, setelah tua dan lelah berkelana, orang mulai kembali mencari, cinta yang hakiki dan lari pada Tuhannya. Mungkin.



Blogged on 7:42 PM by Upay

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Monday, May 31, 2004

KURA-KURA URASHIMA

Pada zaman dahulu kala ada seorang pemuda nelayan yang sangat mencintai laut. Ia suka mendengar gemuruh ombaknya serta memandangi airnya yang datang dan pergi silih berganti. Ia hidup di tepi laut. Jika sedang tidak belayar, dari jendela kamarnya ia memandang ombak-ombak besar berwarna biru memecah diatas batu karang dan kemudian menjadi buih berwarna putih. Laut dengan kelembutan dan kegarangannya dalam pantulan sinar bulan dan tenggelamnya matahari, semuanya ini merupakan teman akrabnya. Tentu saja hal ini dapat di mengerti. Seorang nelayan yang tidak mencintai laut sama celakanya dengan seekor anjing yang ditinggalkan oleh tuannya.

Pemuda gagah itu bernama Urashima. Setiap hari, sebelum mentari menyambut dan memancarkannya sinarnya, ia berangkat dengan perahunya, mengarungi lautan mengumpulkan ikan, dan baru kembali setelah malam tiba. Layar perahunya terkembang, perut kapalnya penuh dengan ikan-ikan yang putih berkilauan bagai perak. Terkadang, jika sedang beruntung, baru sebentar turun ke laut tempat ikannya sudah penuh. Namun, bila sedang naas, kail serta jalanya tetap kosong. Ikan-ikan hasil tangkapannya itu biasanya untuk dirinya sendiri, namun tak jarang ia membagikannya kepada keluarganya. Mereka memang memerlukannya untuk hidup. Namun sebenarnya, ia lebih senang melepas kembali ikan-ikan hasil tangkapannya itu, untuk mengagumi gemerlap dan keindahan sisik-sisik yang tertimpa sinar mentari ataupun bentuknya yang menarik.

Pada suatu senja, saat mentari yang akan tenggelam memancarkan sinarnya yang kemerahan di air laut, Urashima tiba-tiba melihat kailnya tenggelam. Dia menariknya sekuat tenaga, sebab seharian itu ia tak mendapat hasil tangkapan seekor pun. Ia berharap mendapatkan seekor ikan besar yang lincah, namun yang tersangkut di kailnya seekor kura-kura yang kikuk.

“Malang benar! Sore ini aku tak mendapat makanan apapun! “ kata Urashima. “Tetapi aku tak mau memakannya.” Ia kemudian melepaskan kura-kura kecil itu dari kailnya. Membiarkanya kembali ke air dan menyelam di dalam percikan butir- butir air yang jernih. Dari bagian-bagian tengah semburan air itu muncul seorang gadis yang sangat cantik. Urashima melongo melihat kejadiaan itu, dan sebelum ia sadar akan apa yang sedang terjadi, gadis cantik itu duduk di sampingnya .

Gadis cantik itu bertubuh mungil. Rambutnya panjang sepinggang dan berwarna sangat hitam, basah dan berkilau di siram cahaya senja. Rambut itu di ikat di sisi kiri dan kanannya, yang dibelakang dibiarkan terurai. Tanganya lentik dan halus, bertelekan pada bangku perahu. Matanya bundar besar dan sangat jernih, dengan bulu matanya yang lentik, indah sekali mengerjap-ngerjap. Hidungnya bangir dan mungil. Bibirnya merah dadu. Kulit wajahnya putih bersih bagai porselin. Ia mengenakan baju putih panjang terbuat dari sutra, ditaburi manik-manik aneka warna. Semuanya memantulkan kembali sinar yang datang. Di pinggangnya terikat sabuk terbuat dari serabut-serabut tanaman laut berwarna indah. Bau tubuhnya harum lembut. Urashima menggosok-gosok matanya, tak percaya ketika gadis itu tersenyum padanya.

Gadis itu menjelaskan pada nelayan muda yang kebingungan itu bahwa dia adalah putri Dewa laut dan bahwa ayahandanya telah mengizinkannya untuk mengubah diri seperti kura-kura agar bisa bertemu dan mengetahui apakah Urashima benar-benar memiliki hati yang baik.





“Kami yang hidup di dasar laut, “ kata gadis itu, “biasa berkata bahwa mereka-mereka yang mencintai laut adalah garam dunia. Tetapi kami akan sangat bahagia melihat prilaku seperti yang kau contohkan tadi. Sejaksekarang engkau adalah temanku. Maukah kau hidup bersamaku di istana naga, di kerajaan ombak-ombak Hijau?”

Urashima yang terpesona akan kecantikan dan kehalusan bahasa gadis itu tak dapat berkata apa-apa kecuali dengan spontan mengganggukkan kepalanya. Mereka kemudian meluncur kedasar samudra. Urashima berpegangan pada lengan sang putri. Ketika si gadis tersenyum, ombak menyibak, dan sebelum Urashima sadar, mereka dengan cepat sudah berada di depan pintu gerbang istana si putri. Ikan-ikan yang bertopi emas dan berbaju kristal mengawal mereka ke bagian dasar lautan. Mereka kemudian berada di lengan -lengan bunga karang. Tempat itu begitu damai dan tenang. Deru ombak dari kejauhan di permukaan air hanya terdengar samar-samar. Di sanalah terletak istana karang dan mutiara yang sangat indah. Permatanya gemerlap terkena cahaya matahari atau rembulan yang masih dapat menerobos masuk, meski tak begitu terik. Naga-naga yang bersirip beludru menuruti semua permintaan mereka dan melayani mereka dengan hidangan-hidangan laut yang paling enak.

Selama empat tahun Urashima dan Putri Raja hidup bahagia bagai dalam impian. Di dalam istana mereka, rumput-rumput laut menari dengan tenang dan siang malam bermain dalam cahaya senja yang tiada akhirnya.

Urashima merasa sangat bahagia, sampai suatu saat sekor kura-kura kecil yang kulitnya bertahtakan permata datang mengingatkan nya kembali pada dusun kelahirannya. Ia memegang kura-kura itu, meletakkanya pada telapak tanganya, dan tatapan matanya menjadi sendu. Ia ingat akan ibunya yang menjadi tua dalam kesedihan dan kekhawatiran, ingat akan ayahnya yang sudah tua, lumpuh dan sakit-sakitan, yang tak mampu lagi menyirami tanaman sla di dalam kebunnya. Ia teringat akan pantai di masa kanak-kanaknya tempat tempat ia bersenang-senag dengan membangun istan-istana dari pasir.

Putri raja mengerti akan apa yang merisaukan hati Urasima. Sebenarnya ia tak rela mengucapkan kata-kata bijaksana untuk menyenangkan Urashima: sebab hal itu akan menyakiti hatinya sendiri. Ia akan merasa sangat kehilangan. Namun, ia tetap juga mengatakan apa yang mestinya ia katakan.

“Urashima, aku mengerti apa yang merisaukan hatimu. Bila kau ingin kembali kepada keluargamu, pergilah. Sebab, bila aku mencegahmu, maka kau akan membenciku.” Sang putri raja mencoba menahan perasaan dan airmatanya. “Bila kau ingin kembali, bawalah peti kecil yang terbuat dari mutiara dan terikat oleh pita sutra hijau ini. Jangan sampai hilang. Jagalah hati-hati. Yang penting, tidak seorang pun boleh membukanya. Sebab bila ada yang melepas ikatan pita itu, engkau tidak akan pernah dapat kembali ke sisiku.”

Setelah menyerahkan peti itu, sang putri menempatkan Urashima pada sebuah perahu dan melemparkannya ke ombak. Sejenak kemudian Urashima sudah berlayar di permukaan laut. Angin meniupnya dari kejauhan dan membawanya ke tepi pantai tempatnya berasal. Ia melompat dari perahunya menuju kaki bukit tempat rumahnya berdiri dikelilingi pohon-pohon ceri dan pinus. Dengan senag hati penuh kerinduan, ia menuju jalan sempit yang sangat di kenalnya. Mulanya ia tak merasa ada kejanggalan. Langit masih berwarna biru. Jangkrik masih berdesir di rerumputan, sedangkan batu karang berlumut yang dulu pernah ia gunakan sebagai tempat untuk mengamati keindahan laut masih tetap berada pada tempatnya. Tetapi ketika ia tiba di tempat yang seharusnya rumahnya berdiri, ia merasa aneh. Rumah itu sudah lenyap. Segalanya menjadi asing.

Ia berkeliling mencari sesuatu yang dapat dikenalnya. Namun sia-sia. Anak-anak yang muncul dari berbagai arah memandanginya dengan keheranan. Segalanya telah berubah. Ia tak lagi berada di desanya yang dipenuhi hutan-hutan bakau dan petak-petak sawah. Ia telah menjadi orang asing, hanya dalam waktu empat tahun! Ia tak percaya dengan apa yang dialaminya hari itu. Ia bahkan tak berani berkata atau berbicara dengan orang yang ada di sekitarnya, yang memandanginya dengan penuh keheranan. Akhirnya ia bertemu dengan seorang lelaki tua bertongkat yang sedang duduk di atas sebuah batu sambil mengisap pipa tembakau di tangannya. Nampaknya ia sedang mengenang masa lalunya.

Urashima mendekati laki-laki berjenggot putih dan berambut panjang yang juga berwarna putih kelabu itu sambil berkata, “Maafkan saya, pak. Dapatkah bapak menunjukkan di mana rumah Urashima?”

Lelaki tua itu mengernyitkan dahinya yang keriput. Matanya yang buram memandang Urashima dengan teliti. “Urashima ? benarkah engkau berkata tentang Urashima? Bukankah itu nama anak laki-laki yang tenggelam empat ratus tahun yang lalu ketika ia sedang mencari ikan? Bila benar ia yang kau maksudkan, yah, sudah sejak lama saudara-saudara, cucu serta buyutnya meninggal…yah,empat ratus tahun yang lalu, pada suatu hari yang cerah di musim panas seperti saat ini, Urashima lenyap…tak seorangpun pernah melihatnya lagi. Bahkan serpihan perahunya pun tak dapat ditemukan orang. Buyutnya yang terakhir kabarnya sangat mirip Urashima. Ia sangat mencintai laut dan meninggal ditelan badai.” Orang tua itu lalu tersenyum kepadanya.

Hati Urashima begitu pilu. Ia mencoba mengenang semua kejadian yang lampau, tentang ibunya, kakaknya, bapaknya dan tentang semuanya. Tapi hal itu menjadi sangat sulit. Ia tak mampu berfikir tentang apapun saat ini. Orang tua itu menujukkan kepada Urashima pekuburan keluarganya yang dipenuhi lumut dan belukar. Di salah satu kuburan itu di balik semak-semak berduri, ada sebuah batu nisan yang sudah berlumut bertuliskan namanya. Dibawahnya tertulis,”HILANG DALAM SAMUDRA YANG DICINTAINYA “. Tulisan itu sudah buram. Urashima mencungkilnya dengan lidi. Ia membersihkan kuburan itu dengan hati-hati. Ia juga melihat kuburan saudara-saudaranya di kiri dan kanan kuburannya. Kuburan ibu dan bapak nya berdampingan di sebelah atas bagian kuburan-kuburan itu. Beberapa kuburan dengan nisan bertuliskan nama-nama yang tak dikenalnya berjajar-jajar tersusun di bawah kuburannya. Hatinya seperti di koyak-koyak.

Dengan gontai Urashima menuju laut. Ia merasa sangat sedih, letih dan tak berdaya. Ia duduk di atas karang berlumut, meletakkan peti kecil pemberian sang putri pangkuannya. Tanpa sadar ia membuka ikatan pita sutra hijau. Tiba-tiba asap putih membumbung ke udara, membentuk awan yang sangat ringan. Awan itu sejenak melayang didepan mata Urashima. Ia melihat wajah serta tubuh putri Raja terukir di sana. Urashima mengulurkantangan kepadanya dan memanggil namanya. Tetapi angin bertiup, awan itu terbang menjauh dan melayang di atas ombak. Urashima bangkit dan berusaha mengejarnya, tetapi ia tak pernah dapat menangkapnya.

Urashima kemudiaan berhenti di tepi air laut yang biru. Termangu-mangu. Tiba-tiba ia merasa sangat letih, tubuhnya menjadi sangat ringan. Seperti kapas, ia melayang-layang ikut terbang bersama awan dan angin.

Bulan muncul di atas pohon-pohon pinus. Cahayanya menyinari ombak yang datang dan pergi silih berganti, menyapu tepi pantai dengan lembut. Sementara itu, sebuah peti kecil dari mutiara dipermainkan pucuk-pucuk gelombang dan di atas sana, sehelai pita sutra hijau melayang-layang ditiup angin.



Di kutip dari dongeng jepang : 22 Oktober 1993





Blogged on 6:44 PM by Upay

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NYARIS

Jam 6.30 WIB pagi. Aku buru-buru menyusun lembar-lembar fotokopian yang berserakan di atas meja. Tadi malam aku hanya membaca sebagian lantaran tugas yang menumpuk dari dosen yang paling santer dan paling doyan memberi tugas maupun bahan bacaan, Bu Irma, si bom waktu itu. Iya! Dosen berdisiplin militer yang selalu tepat waktu dan perfeksionis itu kadang lembut dan gurih tawanya; namun kadang bisa meledak-ledak amarahnya pada saat yang sama lantaran ada mahasiswa jahil yang kertas kerjanya dipenuhi tip-ex, karena ceroboh melakukan kesalahan. Puih! Dengar katanya:
“ Dalam melakukan pendiskripsian, baik deskripsi fisik maupun daftar jejakan, saya tidak menerima huruf-huruf dari mesin tik rusak hingga kertas kerja kamu berlubang atau tinta hitamnya memenuhi huruf. Lebih-lebih lagi keras kerja yang dipenuhi tip-ex!”.
Sambil berbicara begitu, telunjuk tangan kanannya akan mengacung-ngacung ke atas, sedangkan tangan kirinya diletakkan di belakang. Suaranya tegas menggelegar. Mengesalkan.

Menurut anak-anak angkatan atas, kini Bu Irma lebih santai dibanding masa lalu. Puih! Tetap saja mengesalkan. Itu kata anak-anak. Bagiku itu hal biasa-biasa saja. Soalnya, bapakku lebih gila lagi disiplinya. Lihat saja produknya, jauh darinya, aku jadi selebor berkompensasi. Kalau di depan bapak, mana aku berani!

Kadang aku menikmati kesukahatian, keseleboran, ketidakrapian dan hal-hal yang melanggar benteng-benteng disiplin itu. Tapi tak lama. Dasar-dasar yang ditanamkan bapak ternyata sudah membantu, menyatu dalam jiwa dan terwujud dalam sikap-sikaphidupku.

Seandainya kelak aku jadi dosen, apa boleh buat, sikap Bu Irma mungkin hanya cuillanya saja yang ingin aku tiru. Tehniknya, tugasnya yang selalu membuat mahasiswa terbirit-birit memanfaatkan waktu, dan disiplinnya. Tapi tidak suasana yang ia lahirkan, yang menimbulkan trauma bagi semua mahasiswa yang pernah mengecap sebagian hidup bermasanya: ketegangan. Mungkin aku akan lebih solider, tapi tetatap tegas. Tidak marah-marah. Hm, apa bisa ? orang seperti aku?

Aduh! Tujuh menit lagi jam 6! Aku berlari merebut kamar mandi. Lusi, teman se-kost-ku, tetangga sebelah kamar berputar kelimpungan terbengong-bengong. Dia baru bangun. Aku cengengesan menenteng handuk.

Brak! Uh, kenapa aku tak bisa menahan diri untuk tidak berlama-lama di kamar mandi. Rugi rasanya bila melewatkan waktu bersegar ini cepat-cepat. Aku menikmati setiap busa Zest biru yang harum di atas kulitku. Wanginya memenuhi ruang kecil kamar mandi itu. Kidung yang kunyanyikan tenggelam ditelan suara air yang mengucur dari keran.

Ups! Ajijigrik! Jam besar dirumah induk berdentang keras. Jam 6, nak…cepat…cepat…kataku dalam hati. Lusi yang menunggu di depan pintu kamar mandi tak mau mengambil resiko waktu aku menongolkan kepala. Ia menepi rapat ke tembok rumah induk yang berhadapan dengan kamar mandi. Takut terjadi accident yang tak diinginkan. Aku cengengesan lagi. Wajah bulat itu sungguh lucu dalam ekspresi bangun tidur.

Handuk kugantung sangat rapi di tempatnya. Tempat tidur kurapi kan sekali lagi, hingga tak ada kerut kemerut. Aku memastikan bahwa buku-buku di rak tak ada yang miring atau berdebu. Ya ampun…dalam suasana seperti dikejar setan ini aku masih sempat memikirkan tetek bengek semacam ini. Bawaan lahir ‘kali!

Kamar sudah ku sapu tadi pagi sebelum mandi. Well…sekarang tinggal dandan. Kutaburi badanku dengan purol menthol. Hm…panas menthol itu nyaman sekali rasanya. Sembarangan aku pilih pakaian kesukaanku. Aku tak peduli kombinasinya cocok atau tidak. Namun setelah kukenakan, aku puas sendiri. Aku mematut diri di depan cermin. Tersenyum sendiri.

Untuk yang kedua kalinya aku periksa hasil kerjaku tadi malam. Tugas Bu Irma harus sempurna! Dentang jam berbunyi sekali lagi. Jam 6 lebih 15 menit. Sepatu kukenakan. Kucubit pipi Eka yang masih terbuai dalam mimpi. Teman sekamarku itu menggeliat pelan. Dasar kebo! Masak ia tak terusik sedikitpun atas keributan-keributan yang kutimbulkan sepagi ini.

“Bye, babe…” kataku sambil berlari membuka pintu yang menghubungi daerah ‘kekuasaan ‘ kami dengan taman dan dunia luar. Pintu gerbang dari besi itu sudah tak terkunci lagi, berarti si Pinto sudah bangun. Tugas anak induk semangku yang satu itu memang itu setiap hari, menggembok dan membuka pintu pagar. Aku membuka pagar dengan cepat, menimbulkan derit yang khas.

Tak sampai 5 menit aku sudah sampai di trotoar jalanan yang mulai di penuhi asap knalpot kendaraan yang beseliweran. Ah! T46, segeralah datang….

Vrom…vrom…deru metromini merapat ke trotoar halte. Aku melompat lega. Bus itu penuh anak sekolah. Bangku paling depan, di sebelah supir, kosong. Akumau duduk di situ. Tapi seorang anak laki-laki lebih dulu menyerobot, mengambil kesempatan itu. Yah..aku harus puas bergelantungan seperti kebanyakan orang-orang ini, berhimpit-himpitan, di atas metromini yang berlari liar.

Jalanan sudah macet. Puff! Hilangkan kesempatanku untuk naik kereta pukul 7 kurang 10. Aku harus menunggu kereta berikut, 7 lewat 5 menit. Ah, Bu Irma! Bye…Aku mencari-cari alasan yang tepat agar tugasku nanti dapat diterimanya dengan senyum. Ah…jangan senyum. Tidak berekspresi saja sudah syukur. Tiba-tiba badanku menegang.

Oke! Aku harus berpikir positif agar tidak nervous. Setidak tidaknya aku akan bertemu cowok manis berambut ikal itu pagi ini. Cowok manis yang selalu naik kereta pukul 7 lewat 5. Aku kenal, tidak! Aku tahu cowok ini awalnya karena kami selalu naik dan turun kereta di stasiun yang sama, pada waktu yang sama. Mulai semester ini Fakultas Ekonomi pindah ke Depok. Sejak itu kereta lebih padat dari biasanya.

Biarkan aku bercerita tentang makhluk unik yang memiliki senyum menarik dan gaya yang asik ini. Mulanya aku memperhatikan gaya berpakaian yang sedikit beda di banding anak-anak cowok kebanyakan. Ia selalu memakai kaos dengan warna-warna pastel yang lembut, warna kesukaanku. Kaosnya berkrah. Jarang mengenakan celana jeans. Selama yang kutahu, jeansnya cuma ada dua, warna biru muda dan hitam. Selebihnya ia selalu memakai celana katun yang lembut, berwarna pastel juga. Tas ranselnya berwarna abu-abu dan selalu dikepit di tangan kanannya, tidak disangkutkan di bahu. Sepatu sandalnya berwarna hitam, dari kulit. Tali belakangnya diinjak seenaknya. Langkahnya tegap seperti ABRI, namun dalam gerak yang santai. Rambutnya yang selalu di potong pendek, ikal kemerahan. Sinar matanya tajam menantang. Bentuk hidungnya lucu, tinggi, namun membentuk lekukkan halus yang memberi kesan angkuh. Setiap kali melihat ke arahku, bibirnya berubah datar, membentuk garis bagus, senyum yang ditahan.

Awalnya aku tak peduli bila memperhatikan tingkahnya. Hampir semua anak yang rutin menanti kereta sering kuperhatikan tingkah dan geraknya, namun yang ini istimewa.

Suatu kali aku bercerita pada lupi & the gank. Berbagai rezeki’, ceritanya. Kami cekikikan, ngerumpi’in lirikan-lirikan maut cowok manis ini. Iya! Ia mulai curi-curi pandang. Kadang senyum dan ketawa sendiri, hanya beberapa meter dari kami. Cuma itu. Celoteh anak-anak mulai berkembang biak, menjurus ke hal-hal romantis. Iyalah….apalagi! mereka mulai menjodoh-jodoh kan aku dan cowok yang makin lama makin cute itu.

Aku yang mulanya cuek, diam-diam mulai memperhatikan lebih detil. Kurang ajar! analisa anak-anak benar juga. Aku bukan ada di alam mimpi. Semprul…semprul….senyumnya memang cuma untukku. Ia mulai rajin ke Kansas, kantin sastra, memperluas wawasan. Sialnya, aku tak pernah punya kesempatan atau keberanian lebih. Senyum pun aku tak berani. Aku cukup pemalu untuk melakukan movement; sedang cowok itu, meski tak gentar saling pandang, tetap tak melakukan perkembangan. Alhasil, aku cukup puas bisa melihat senyum manisnya.

Alamak! Tahu sendiri respoon Lupi & the gank.
“Alah, Pay…masak gitu-gitu aja. Cemen, lo, ah…payah! Move..dong, move..mana kegape’an,lo…”

Atau ledakan-ledakan yang ‘kena’ seperti,
“Wih…si Upay bener-bener jatuh cinta! Woi! Upay udah gede ..Upay puber!”

Sial memang; kenapa justru sudah semester lima begini aku baru mikirin makhluk dengan sebutan cowok. Biasanya aku memang mendapat julukan wanita penggoda, maksudnya, suka goda’in cowok-cowok yang suka kegedean rasanya. Tapi cuma sebatas itu. Kali ini…ehm,cuih!

“Pintu…pintu..” kenek kopaja berseragam biru itu berteriak-teriak. Suara lonceng kereta berdentang-dentang. Pintu palang kereta pelan-pelan turun. Jam 7 pagi. Wah..aku melompat turun dari kopaja, berlari ke stasiun. Orang-orang berteriak mengusirku. Tapi aku cuek. Kereta dari arah Manggarai, jurusan kota Bogor sebentar lagi mendekat. Dengan sukses akumenjejakkan kaki di trotoar stasiun Tebet. Kereta sudah berhenti. Penumpang-penumpang berebut naik. Kereta terlambat 10 menit! Alhamdulilah! Di gerbong paling belakang, pada detik-detik terakhir aku lompat masuk. Yes! Pintu kereta tertutup tepat di balik punggungku.

Ah, Bu Irma...here I come!


Blogged on 6:19 PM by Upay

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Akusangat letih. Isi kepalaku seperti di aduk-aduk.bermacam-macam cerita tersusun acak-acakan, tak beraturan dan semakin membuatku letih. Kurebahkan sekujur tubuhku di atas pembaringan yang keras dan berlapis kain bergambar taburan bunga-bunga warna warni. Kini. kurasakan pembaringan itu mengikatku kuat, seolah menyerap semua tenagaku. Mataku belum terpejam, mesti lampu kamar sudah kumatikan sejak tadi.Kutarik lampu lampu baca diatas meja di sebelah kananku, Kutekan tombol saklarnya dan melirik jam di sebelahnya. Jam3 pagi! Segera kupejamkan mataku kuat-kuat. Senandung “kissing a fool”nya George Michael pelan-pelan kuikuti. Kubiarkan pikiranku mengembara mengikuti syair-syair lagu itu. Pengaruh obat tidur yang kutelan setengah jam yang lalu mulai terasa .

Pengembaraanku berhenti pada sebuah ruang yang sangat terang. Ruang yang sangat aku kenal, yang mengingatkanku pada masa kecilku. Iya, ini ruang tunggu dokter Azis, dokter yang selalu memberiku permen setelah memeriksa kesehatanku. Keadan ruang itu persis sama seperti 10 tahun yang lalu. Ruang persegi panjang yang cukup luas itu berisi bangku-bangku panjang yang disusun rapat ke dinding.

Kursi kecil dengan meja penuh balok-balok kecil aneka bentuk dan dapat disusun menjadi bangunan-bangunan istana tergeletak diatasnya, masih dipojok kanan. Di situ biasanya aku menghabiskanwaktu sembari menunggu giliran. Di sebelahnya ada rak penuh majalah. Dulu pun aku senang mebolak-balik majalah–majalah itu, membacanya sampai tuntas, meski aku tak mengerti isinya..

Di pojok sebelah kiri, dekat pintu menuju kamar periksa ada meja kayu berpelitur coklat. Di atasnya ada satu rak tempat menyusun file-file pasien. Di belakang meja itu duduk seorang wanita muda dengan mata yang sangat dalam, ada lengkungan hitam di seputar mata itu. Rambut pendeknya yang bergelombang di hiasi bando berwarna coklat. Ia berbaju putih perawat dan asyik mencoret-coret fomulir di depannya, sambil menyebut nama-nama pasien yang mendapat giliran. ia terlihat mondar-mandir dari kamar periksa ke mejanya dan sebaliknya sambil membawa file-file tertentu.

Jam dinding bergambar Donal Bebek yang sedang tersenyum lebar masih tergantung di tembok berwarna krem. Jarum-jarumnya menunjukkan pukul 3. Aku tak tahu, pukul 3 pagi atau sore, sebab hanya ruang itu saja yang terang menderang. Di luar sangat gelap. Terdengar suara dan peluit kereta api, sehingga kusangka aku berada di stasiun kereta. Sebentar kemudian tercium bau amis dan debu ombak terdengar pula. Aku merasakan ada yang aneh, tapi aku tak mengerti apa.

Di atas bangku-bangku yang disusun membentuk huruf L itu duduk orang-orang yang sepertinya aku kenal,tapi aku tak ingat entah aku di mana, atau entah siapa mereka. Ada lelaki setengah baya berambut keriting sangat hitam sedang duduk dengan malas dan meluruskan kakinya ke depan. Wajah lelaki itu seperti mayat, berbibir tipis hingga hampir tak kelihatan,dan bermata cekung, berwarna coklat dan tak bercahaya. Kulitnya yang gelap di tutupi baju kotak-kotak berdasar putih. Kepalanya di sandarkan ke dinding tanpa gerak. Hanya asap yang mengepul dari rokok yang terselip di jarinya saja yang menandakan adanya dinamika pada dirinya.


Di sebelah lelaki tadi duduk seorang pria dengan jas coklat gelap yang sangat tidak cocok dengan warna kulitnya yang berbencak-bencak hitam. Tanganya menyilang di depan perutnya yang buncit, bersepatu coklat mengkilat dengan retakan-retakan yang terlihat jelas pada tekukan jari-jarinya. Pria itu tertidur dengan pulas dan kepalanya terkulai ke kiri.

Di sebelah lelaki yang tertidur itu duduk seorang wanita muda dengan wajah letih dan murung. Matanya merah, Ia sedang menepuk-nepuk punggung seorang anak kecil di pangkuannya, menyelimutinya dan membalurinya dengan balsem. Bau balsem itu memenuhi ruangan. Wanita itu berkalung emas besar yang tergantung di lehernya. Rambutnya kusut dan berwarna hitam kecoklatan. Sorot matanya memancarkan kekhawatiran.

Anak kecil yang duduk dipangkuanya bertubuh gempal, berumur sekitar 2 tahun, memuntahkan cairan kuning seperti bubur jagung. Wajahnya memerah, sementara matanya yang kecil itu berair. Tak ada suara yang keluar dari mulutnya, kecuali dencingan gelang emas yang bergoyang-goyang di tangan sebelah kirinya. Ibunya dengan sibuk dan panik segera membersihkan semua kotoran-kotoran yang bececer di lantai dan bajunya.

Aku merasa wajahku sedingin es. Angin kencang dari luar yang berbau amis laut itu menggoyang-goyang tirai jendela. Aku tak mengerti mengapa aku ada disitu, bersama orang-orang aneh yang sepertinya aku kenal, tapi entah kapan dan di mana. Kalau pun ruang itu benar ruang tunggu dokter Azis, siapa orang aneh-aneh ini? Pasien- pasiennya? Tidak mungkin. Dokter azis adalah dokter sepesialis anak, dan kabar terakhir yang aku dengar tentangnya adalah bahwa ia telah menutup prakteknya beberapa tahun lalu. Aku merinding.

Tiba-tiba tirai pintu penghubung kamar periksa dan ruang tunggu yang bermotif batang-batang bamboo hijau tersingkap. Aku melihat Pinto menyeruak masuk. Terkembang senyum di wajah lelaki muda itu, senyum paling lebar yang pernah aku lihat. Aku menghempas nafas lega akhirnya aku menemui orang-orang yang benar-benar aku kenal. Pinto memakai kaos biru muda berulis POLO di depannya. Wajah nya penuh keringat. Dia tak memakai kacamata yang biasanya dikenakannya, sehingga aku melihat bola matanya yang hitam dan tajam. Dia mendekat padaku, sangat dekat, hingga aku dapat mencium bau tubuhnya dan bisa melihat denyut nadi di pelipisnya. Semakin dekat, senyum lebarnya semakin hilang, berubah menjadi senyum bengis. Aku tak pernah melihat pencaran kebencian seperti itu sebelumnya. Ia seakan datang ingin mencekikku.

Aku merasa seolah –olah jantungku akan melompat keluar dari rongga dadaku. Aku tak bisa bernafas. Wajah Pinto mengerut dan tiba-tiba berubah menjadi wajah bapak. Lidahku seperti tergigit karena kagetnya. Wajah itu tua dan sedih. Sinar matanya yang kelabu itu redup, tanpa kehidupan.

Kini semua mata yang ada di ruang itu lantang dan tajam mengarah ke mataku. Dadaku seperti ditindih, sesak dan perih. Prang! Suara kaca pecah berlanjut gelindingan beling membangunkanku. Semua wajah–wajah itu hilang, berganti sepotong wajah yang sangat kukenal. Eka, teman sekamarku, berdiri kaku di pojok tempat tidurku. Matanya ketakutan, tangannya menutup mulutnya yang terbuka. “Maaf…,” katanya lirih dan terburu membereskan pecahan gelas di lantai.

Aku beristighfar berulang kali. Anehnya, aku merasa sangat lega Tak pernah rasanya aku sebahagia ini melihat orang ketakutan seperti itu. Aku menyumpahi pikiranku yang kotor itu.

Jam dinding kamarku menunjukkan 5 pagi. Aku bergegas membasuh wajah dan tubuhku dengan air dingin. Wudhu dan sholat subuh dengan segera. Dalam khusyukku aku berjanji akan segera menelepon bapak. Akan kukatakan padanya, bahwa aku sangat mencintainya, bahwa aku rindu padanya.


30 september 1993


Blogged on 6:08 PM by Upay

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RUANG 635

Aku terengah-engah menaiki tangga demi tangga di gedung 6. Tak lama, kudapati diriku ada di lantai 3 sekarang. Di lantai ini pastilah ruang kuliah itu, pikirku. Ada beberapa ruang yang masing-masing bernomor awal 63 dengan kertas jadwal berlaminating tertempel di pintu. Ruang-ruang itu mengelilingi tangga. Semua pintu yang terbuat dari kayu berwarna coklat itu tertutup. Tak ada suara yang kudengar selain langkah-langkah kaki dan hembusan nafasku sendiri. Aku diam sejenak mengamati ruang demi ruang dari tempatku berdiri.

Di sisi sebelah kiri kulihat pintu kayu bernomor 635 sedikit terbuka. Lamat mulai kudengar suara seorang laki-laki menerangkan sesuatu. Itu pasti suara dosen. Dengan segera kudorong pintu perlahan. Suara gerit pintu menandakan bahwa engselnya perlu diminyaki. Lalu kulongokkan kepalaku ke dalam ruangan yang kira- kira berukuran 4 kali 5 meter. Lantainya terbuat dari marmer berwarna coklat. Meski tidak ada kotoran- kotoran berarti diatasnya, debu-debu yang menempel memastikan bahwa ruangan itu belum dibersihkan.

Dinding di hadapanku terbuat dari bata coklat yang menonjolkan bentuknya yang persegi panjang. Di atas bata -bata itu ada jendela kaca sorong berwarna gelap yang dibuka sebagian agar udara luar dapat masuk. Di balik tembok itu ada teras yang dibatasi tembok bata lain yang serupa dengan tinggi hampir mencapai atap ruang itu. Dari situ cahaya dari luar dapat masuk, juga terlihat atap gedung 5 dan 7 . Daun – daun pohon palem bergoyang-goyang diterpa angin.

Disebrang kanan terdapat tembok dengan jendela kaca sorong yang sedikit terbuka, teras, dan tembok dibelakangnya yang serupa dengan yang kulihat sebelumnya.

Dinding sebelah kiri dan kananku terbuat dari tripleks bercat putih. Disebelah kiri tertempel alat pengatur kipas angin yang berfungsi menghidup dan mematikan serta mengatur kecepatan kipas angin yang ada dilangit –langit. Alat pemutarnya sudah hilang.

Diruang itu ada bangku-bangku kuliah dari kayu berwarna coklat. Sederetan bangku-bangku memenuhi baris paling belakang. Pada bangku ketiga dari kiri duduk seorang gadis berbaju ungu,celana panjang hitam dan berjilbab sedang asyik menulis. Di bangku sebelah kanannya teronggok tas ransel berwarna hitam dengan ikatan penutup yang sedikit terbuka.

Di pojok ruang, masih dideret yang sama, seorang mahasiswa berkaos putih, bercelana jens dan berambut panjang sedang memandang kedepan, kearah dosen, dengan sunguh-sungguh. Barisan didepanya hanya terdiri dari beberapa bangku yang jumlahnya tidak lebih banyak dari bangku dibelakangnya. Seorang mahasiswa duduk diantara dua orang mahasiswi. Bajunya berkaos putih bermotif etnis dengan celana yang hampir pudar warnanya. Rambutnya pendek. Tangannya sedang membolak balik kertas di hadapannya. Gadis di sebelah kiri mahasiswa itu berambut panjang, keriting dan terikat ke belakang. Gadis itu sedang mempermainkan tali tas batik kecil sambil mendengarkan ocehan dosen yang duduk tepat di depannya dengan seksama. Gadis di sebelah kanan berambut lurus tergerai dijepit ke belakang. Bajunya hitam dengan kulot hitam batik. Ia memangku wajahnya dengan sebelah tangan. Seperti yang lain, dia juga asyik mendengar ocehan dosen itu.
Dosen itu duduk dipojok kanan ruang yang terbatas jendela kaca sorong, di atas kursi hitam dan kelihatan empuk sambil menaikan satu kakinya bertumpu pada kaki yang lain. Jenggot dan kacamata tebal coklatnya memberi ciri yang khas dan kesan bahwa ia seorang yang konvensional. Dilihat dari perawakannya ia sudah tak muda lagi. Kemeja krem yang dipakainya berlengan pendek, celana coklat dengan ikat pinggang hitam dan bersepatu sendal. Sambil terus berbicara, ia mengepul-ngepulkan asap dari pipa yang diisapnya. Asap berbau tembakau itu memenuhi ruangan dan menyesakkan dada. Kalau bukan mahasiwa , aku pasti sudah menumpah-nyumpah.

Di depannya ada meja kayu berwarna coklat. Diatas meja itu, di pojok kiri depan ada segelas teh berlepek dan diberi tutup stainlessteel. Isi nya masih penuh. Disamping kanan gelas itu ada spidol untuk whiteboard berwarna biru dan penghapus yang digeletakkan terbalik hingga busa penghapusnya yang sudah hitam menghadap keatas. Tak jauh dari situ ada map biru. Map absen, aku kira.

Sejenak suasana jadi hening. Tidak ada suara galau kelas lain kecuali suara derak kipas angin dan decit-decit halus pertanda ada sedikit kerusakan pada kipas itu.

Wajah-wajah yang tak satu pun aku kenal itu kini mengarah kepadaku. Tatapan mata mereka menujukkan bahwa kehadiranku menggangu suasana. Segera kusadari bahwa aku salah masuk ruangan. Dengan terburu dan gugup kucap kata maaf. Aku segera berbalik dan menghambur menuruni tangga. Sial! Kusesali diriku yang tak menyadari pentingnya fungsi kertas berlaminating yang tertempel di tiap pintu tadi.





Blogged on 2:18 AM by Upay

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